Grandparents play critical role in the shaping of new generations
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By ERIN ANDERSEN / Lincoln Journal Star
Amid the nearly empty cans of Axe, Tag and other manly body sprays sit two polished seashells, a sand dollar strung on a peach-colored ribbon and a small wooden block shellacked with a painting of the Virgin Mary and Christ child.
Not typical fare for a teen-age boy’s dresser — other than the body spray, that is.
But these little trinkets are important.
Sept. 7 is Grandparents Day. In honor of Grandparents Day, the following special perks are offered to grandparents on Sunday:
* Lincoln Children’s Zoo — Free admission and free train rides to all grandparents when accompanied by grandchildren.
* Lincoln Children’s Museum — Free admission and a free family photo. Other special activities include Bingo with prizes, facepainting, chair massages, cookies and giveaways.
They are the keepsakes my nearly 15-year-old son inherited from his late grandmother and great-aunt. Their value cannot be assessed in dollars, but in memories.
Keepsakes and the stories behind them link children to their grandparents and the past of their ancestors, says Susan Bosak, chair of the Legacy Project, intergenerational educator and author of the award-winning book “A Little Something.”
The book details her own relationship with her grandmother, who would end each visit with, “I want to give you a little something … ” as she passed on a family keepsake and story to her granddaughter.
Sunday marks the 29th annual Grandparents Day — a day set aside to honor the richness grandparents add to the lives of their grandchildren.
The first holiday was celebrated Sept. 9, 1979. At the time there were an estimated 17 million grandparents in the United States.
Today that number has grown to 70 million grandparents in the United States.
More than 6.1 million of them live with grandchildren age 18 or younger. And 2.5 million of those grandparents are responsible for their grandchildren’s most basic needs — food, shelter, clothing, etc. — according to the U.S. Census Bureau.
Put another way, 5.7 million children — or about 8 percent of all U.S. children — live with a grandparent. The majority of those children, 3.7 million, live in their grandparent’s home, as opposed to having a grandparent live in their parent’s home.
And 30 percent of children 5 and under whose mothers work outside the home, are taken care of by grandparents while their mothers are at work.
“Grandparents play an increasingly critical role in the shaping of new generations,” said Christine Crosby, founder and publisher of GRAND magazine. “It’s about time we learn to value grandparents in our society as much as other cultures do. We will all benefit.”
Yet, for all grandparents do, studies show perhaps one of the most crucial roles — that of bridging the past with future generations — is being lost.
In 2007 Ancestry.com, a genealogy Web site, conducted a survey asking people how much they know about their families’ personal histories.
According to survey results, one in three people could not even name any of their great- grandparents. Only 43 percent of those surveyed knew both of their grandmothers’ maiden names. Only 22 percent know what their grandfathers did for a living, and 28 percent were not sure if any of their ancestors had served in the military.
So what? Is family history really that important?
Experts say definitely.
“These relationships give you things you can’t get anywhere else,” Bosak said. “They make us feel connected — not only to each other, but to something bigger, to the flow of life, to the past and to the future.”
And perhaps even more importantly they enrich the lives of both child and grandparent — in ways you may not have imagined.
Studies find children benefit by getting a better sense of who they are and where they have come from. They have higher self-esteem and better grades in school. Their parents are often less stressed when there’s an active supportive grandparent in their children’s lives, Bosak said.
And older people live longer, healthier lives with less memory loss and depression and are much happier when they are actively involved with the young, Bosak said.
15 tips
Here are 15 suggestions from the Legacy Project and Kendle on how to make some lasting memories with your grandchildren:
1. Make a family memory book — Gather pictures of family members across generations and make a scrapbook by writing in the stories that have been passed on through generations.
2. Start a family Web site — Have grandparents and grandchildren create it together.
3. Play a game the grandparents used to play.
4. Read a book your grandparents read when they were your age — Grandparents can make classic children’s literature even more rewarding by adding in details of what life was like at the time.
5. Prompt family storytelling with a game of “Did You Ever …?” — Share stories and compare memories from different times. For example, did you ever go on a boat, stay on a farm, sleep in a cabin, act in a play, stay at a fancy hotel …
6. Learn how to cook grandma’s favorite recipe — Whether that’s a traditional holiday dish or her secret cookie recipe, spend time in the kitchen with grandma cooking a recipe that can be passed down to the next generation.
7. Take part in a grandparent’s favorite hobby — Learn about the daily activities that bring them joy.
8. Pick out one interesting, unique or strange family heirloom — Grandparents can explain the history of the item and why it is special to the family.
9. Learn where you came from — Drive through your grandparents’ old neighborhood and listen to stories about their old neighbors or family outings at the local park.
10. Go back in time to the movies — Rent a classic the grandparents enjoyed seeing on the big screen years ago. There are plenty of great old movies other than just the ones that run during the holidays.
11. Ask to look at your grandparent’s wedding pictures or high school year books — Learn about their best friends and see pictures of them when they were so much younger.
12. Play “Family Memories Quiz Bowl” — Write questions on slips of paper and see who remembers past family events and experiences.
13. Preserve a memory for future generations — Make a home video with grandparents, letting them discuss their favorite memories.
14. Encourage grandparents to get involved in their grandchild’s education — From attending special events or volunteering in the classroom.
15. Encourage grandparents and grandchildren to let each other know what they think is special about the other.
For more ideas visit www.legacyproject.org.
Reach Erin Andersen at 473-7217 or eandersen@journalstar.com.
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